Sex Outweighs Religion In The UK

The world is truly upside-down today. In a landmark judgment in the UK this week, a couple was denied the right to provide foster care to children – because their religious beliefs prevent them from telling a child that a homosexual lifestyle is acceptable.

The battle lines between Christianity and humanism just got a little more clearly drawn.

The UK couple in this story are Pentecostal Christians in Derby, UK. They had previously provided foster care for fifteen children in the 1990’s, and wanted to return to that work in 2011. But something changed in the UK between that time and today. In short, religious “tolerance” is no longer extended to conservative Christian views in the country which produced the Mayflower Pilgrims and C.S. Lewis. And don’t forget the praise that was once given to Eric Liddell (Chariots of Fire), the famed Scottish athlete who would not run in the Olympics on Sunday due to his religious beliefs. Can it be that the world is turning from the God of the Bible as quickly as we are witnessing it?

To sum up the story line – sex is more important than religion in the UK. This trend against Christian ethics is not a far cry from the Hitler-style ethnic cleansing so reviled by the British themselves only seventy years ago. Does that seem overstated? It is not – here are some quotes from the BBC article. Read these, and ask yourself if they look eerily similar to something that might have appeared in Nazi propaganda.

‘…Lord Justice Munby and Mr Justice Beatson ruled that laws protecting people from discrimination because of their sexual orientation "should take precedence" over the right not to be discriminated against on religious grounds.’


‘They said that if children were placed with carers who objected to homosexuality and same-sex relationships, "there may well be a conflict with the local authority's duty to 'safeguard and promote the welfare' of looked-after children".’


‘The court confirmed that the local authority is properly entitled to consider a prospective foster carer's views on sexuality when considering their application to become a foster parent and in fact, failure to do so would potentially leave it in breach of its own guidance as well as the National Minimum Standards.’

Don’t miss the import of that last statement – it boldly says that government “minimum standards” outweigh any religious belief, including the belief of parents. Make no mistake, the UK is now only one small step away from telling parents that they cannot teach Christian views on sexuality to their own children. In my lifetime, I now believe that I will be reading a BBC story where that very thing will happen – the UK government will remove children from their parent’s home because of their conservative Christian views, and place them in a state-run facility. And like Nazi Germany in the 1930’s and 1940’s, millions will buy the lie.

God forbid that such a thing will be imported to our United States. But, of course, there are those in the high ranks of our own government who desire for our nation to be “more European”. But if they try to bring this intolerance to our land, I hope they will get a fight from the Christian parents here. Better yet, let’s make sure that we elect and retain leaders who will never go down this path.

Though I expect to read about and witness the decline of civilization, as predicted in the Bible, I am amazed at the speed with which it is happening. This story simply could not have happened in the days of the Cleavers on Leave It To Beaver, or even as recently as my own high school graduation. Something has changed – and it is happening very rapidly. The outrage of the Christian community should be loud and ever-present over this story. But do we see that? Have we given up on publicly championing the cause of Christ and the laws of God? Am I tempted to ignore this and just assume it is the status quo? May it never be…

For the BBC article, click here.

There Is a Boy…

There is a boy who nearly died in the womb. This was a situation entirely unknown to his parents, and it caused them to think more about the preciousness of life. But the boy held on to that life, because God knew there was something special about to happen.

If that was not trial enough, that boy was born having been starved of oxygen during the birth. His face and fingers were blue, and he was rushed to a table by doctor and nurses for revival methods. His mother and father were overwhelmed with doubt about what to do, and could only watch helplessly from the corner and pray. And again, God stepped in and made sure that there were no ill-effects.

There is a boy who smiled and laughed through his infant childhood. As a baby, he was truly inseparable from his mother, and he could tell when she was not physically near. He was even able to sense when his father tried to kiss his mother in the next room, and would immediately begin crying, because for that moment he was not the object of her primary attention. Mother and father marveled at his sensitivity.

As he grew, this boy once gave nearly all the money he possessed to a church missions effort, because he was deeply moved by the plight of others and because, as he said, they needed it more than he did. He never told anyone that he did this, but it was observed from across the room. His mother and father watched in wonder at his selfless heart.

There is a boy who gives unselfishly of his time to others. While the temptation of self-centered youth is great, this boy spends hours doing precious and meaningful things for a neighbor, with absolutely no thought for compensation. And when that neighbor insists on a generous reward, this remarkable boy refuses over and over. When he finally loses the argument, he is truly overcome, because he gave those hours for the simple purpose of blessing another person with his gifts. One of his first thoughts is of the tithe he will give to the church.

This boy’s mother and father watch these things and they store them up in their hearts. His father, who is not known as an emotional person, is brought to tears one night when he observes the unselfish actions of the young boy. He knows that the boy is a far better person than he was at this young age. This realization makes him sad for his own selfish youth, and yet exceedingly grateful that the next generation will serve God in deeper and more wonderful way. The father realizes that his own life is but a stepping stone to something more eternal and consequential than he ever dreamed. It breaks the father’s heart to see that it took him so long to understand this purpose. But it gives him satisfaction to see God’s work being carried out with increasing desire and humility. Both mother and father are forever changed because of what they see in their own offspring.

Now, there is a young man. What will he do next?

Notes: The Christian Family Conference 2010 (Part 9)

My wife, oldest daughter and I attended the Christian Family Conference in Denver this past week. It was an amazing time of encouragement with other Christian parents – most of whom are devoted to homeschooling and home-training their children to be godly men and women, prepared to take on the world with a multi-generational vision. I’m posting some of the notes I took from the conference sessions. Some are sure to fly in the face of the traditions and cultures which most people would consider normal in today’s culture. But these men who spoke to us used the Scriptures, and their lives and the lives of their children are a testament to their integrity and boldness on these topics. Their words motivate me to continue to raise my children in a radical, counter-culture, God-fearing way.

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Chuck Black is an ex-test pilot turned homeschooling father. Really. He gave a lot of very practical lessons about raising our children in today’s world. One look at his family will demonstrate his success in the area of parenting – if you stop by his booth, his children are there running the show – they are polite, well-spoken, talented , and well on their way to becoming lights for God in a dark world.

Chuck did an excellent job of reinforcing my belief that it is the family, not church youth groups, that is responsible for developing maturity in our children. “Youth group” is a relatively modern creation. Our family often must choose between youth group activities…and being together as a family. We almost always choose the latter, and I believe that this is the biblical model. Please don’t get this wrong – I’m not saying that youth groups are inherently bad or evil – the point is that parental involvement should be the primary driver of spiritual and emotional maturity. Without it, youth group gatherings can be simply a pooling of immaturity with no real lasting value. When the parents abdicate the role of being the main spiritual mentors and enforcers in the family, the children are operating at a severe disadvantage.

“Equipping Your Children to Overcome the Cultural Pressures of Today” by Chuck Black

· One-hundred years ago, children transitioned to adulthood in a very short time, and at a young age. Today, we allow them seven to eight years of “teenage time”. This is a new invention – it didn’t used to be this way.

· Part of the reason is that there is a lot more time, money, and available entertainment in today’s society

· Children are maturing physically at an earlier age, but their spiritual and emotional maturity is coming later – this creates a maturity gap that is often filled with entertainment – and Satan is targeting this gap, instead of allowing the family to fill it

· Negative peer pressure and broken relationships exacerbate the maturity problem

· Problems in today’s society that need strong parenting in order to avoid them:

· 1) Large amounts of time are spent with immature youth – limit it, monitor it, or stop it!

· 2) Our children are culturally encouraged to spend time with, or have physical relationships with the opposite sex, without commitment – don’t allow it!

· 3) Young people are culturally discouraged to marry at an early age – this creates physical pressures and may increase the length of the maturity gap

· 4) Our children live in an entertainment-oriented world – one way we can push back against this is to help our children discover the joy and accomplishment in labor

· 5) We have culturally established academic education to take place outside of the home – parents are rarely seen as teachers anymore, and this is a fairly recent change in our society (over the last 150 years). Homeschooling restores this area to its proper place.

· 6) We have culturally established spiritual education to take place outside of the home – many parents see Sunday school or youth group as being the prime places where their children will learn about God, and so have abdicated the role of being the spiritual leaders of their family, in favor of a youth minister or another parent.

· When you see a young man or woman who is especially mature for their age, ask yourself – did they get that way because of what happened to them at school, at church…or at home?

· Chuck Black’s wife calculates that homeschooling allows her to spend 15,680 more hours with each of her children than if she had sent them to public school. There is a lot of mentoring and heartfelt communication that can take place during those hours.

· The responsibilities of parents toward their children: 1) Lead your children to the Lord, 2) Train your children, 3) Discipline your child, 4) Equip your child, 5) Protect your children from physical, emotional, and spiritual harm, 6) Carefully expose your children to important things – keep them innocent, but not ignorant, 7) Disciple your children in the Lord – and be purposeful about this, 8) Launch your children toward a target

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Back to Notes: The Christian Family Conference 2010 (Part 1)
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The Danger of Not Letting Them Go (Part 3 – When To Let Your Kids Go)

For some reason, this subject has been heavy on my heart lately. I have prayed daily for wisdom about whether or not to write about it – and for God to reveal His truth to me on the topic. I have many dear friends who are school teachers, public school parents, or who may simply disagree with the amount of protection that I give to my own children. The answer to the question “When should I let my kids go out into the world?” is not the same for every child or family. There is no easy formula. But for those who have children and who want to see them glorify God in their lives when they leave the nest, let me just say this – this is one thing that you don’t want to get wrong.

I plan to cover this topic in three segments:

1) The Big Test
2) The “Salt and Light” Argument
3) The Danger of Not Letting Them Go

Whether you agree or not – I encourage comments. I especially encourage other viewpoints when they are accompanied by scripture. Believe me when I say that this was written under prayerful circumstances, and with no accusing finger pointed at anyone. Really.
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The year was 1982, and I walked into my high-school literature class with my Bible and a few things to say. I was fortunate enough to be in the Advanced Placement class where we were encouraged to debate and argue over what we believed. I was often at odds with many in the class and, more importantly, with the class teacher, who was a devout atheist. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the discussions we had, because they were very lively and forced me to carefully research why I believed what I did.

On this one occasion, I was especially excited, because we had been having a discussion about morality and where the general feelings of right and wrong had originated. Since we were always reading from various pieces of literature to make a point, I thought reading from some select passages in Romans 1 would serve to demonstrate my side of the story, and make some people think about what God had to say on the matter.

I was wrong.

As the discussion progressed, I commented that I had some thoughts on the subject from the Bible. The teacher became very animated and refused to let me continue. She let it be known that I was not allowed to read from the Bible in her class, and that I was to never return with it again in my hands. Any other book was acceptable to argue the point with, but the Bible was not allowed. For the moment, I was crushed. No one came to my defense. I remember going for a week after that in silence in class. Without the Scriptures to refer to, anything I had to say would have simply been an opinion. To me, the class was simply “pooling ignorance”, adrift without a solid reference point on which to take hold. I thought I had lost. But you need to read to the end of this post to discover the real finish to this story.

I was raised in both a family and in a strict church environment which impressed upon me the importance of the Bible and the need be prepared to debate and argue for the truth. This upbringing readied me at a fairly early age to defend Christ and holy living. By high school, I was ready to accept bitterness, criticism, and even rejection from others without the possibility of losing the moral compass that guided me. My parents and a strong church family were responsible for this. But before this point, I don’t think I was ready to stand up to the abuse.

Proverbs 22:6 does not say, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is six he will not turn from it.” As I’ve pointed out previously, somewhere between the ages of two and thirty-five, there lies an age when a child is ready to independently go forth and defend the Christian faith. The age of maturity differs for each child (for some, it may indeed be six, though I think that is rare). Prior to that point, there is a danger that the world will have a mitigating effect on the child’s own moral compass. It is the duty of the Christian parent to be sure that they provide guidance, training and protection until that independent point is reached.

There is a popular phrase which goes like this, “That which does not kill you makes you stronger.” I respectfully disagree. There is an insidious design in Satan’s plan in which we are sometimes led to believe that getting close to evil, and then escaping it, is somehow more desirable than to never have been close to evil at all. The more desirable path for training is to keep our children away from evil to start with, without the need to later untangle the effects of sin (Proverbs 1:8, 6:23, and especially 23:19) . C. S. Lewis, in the preface to The Great Divorce, put it this way:

“I do not think that all who choose wrong roads perish; but their rescue consists in being put back on the right road. A sum can be put right: but only by going back till you find the error and working it afresh from that point, never by simply going on. Evil can be undone, but it cannot ‘develop’ into good. Time does not heal it.”

There are pictures and words in my head today which I cannot get rid of because of exposure to movies and conversations in my youth. These things are seemingly indelible on my mind – no amount of time or prayer seems to cure me of the exposure to them. It is a constant struggle to turn away from temptation, or remind myself to refrain from anger when I’m pushed too hard. I would have been better off if I had never had the experiences to begin with. And this drives my desire to shelter and protect my own children from the subtle influence of the world.

But…there comes a time when I believe we are called upon to send our children out – well-prepared – to defend the faith. The fact is this – the world is a lost and broken place, and it needs Jesus. And Matthew 5 does call upon us to be a light to the world, a city on a hill that cannot be hidden. The danger of not letting our children go forth to be that shining light is that the world may never see God’s salvation through them. Their wise and matured example is part of God’s plan, as we see in Daniel 12:3,

“Those who are wise will shine like the brightness of the heavens, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars for ever and ever.”

This has the effect of changing the world and us, as stated in 2 Corinthians 3:18,

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

Our example may even carry past our own life on this earth, as is seen with Abel in Hebrews 11:4,

“By faith Abel offered God a better sacrifice than Cain did. By faith he was commended as a righteous man, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith he still speaks, even though he is dead.”

To conclude the opening story - ten years after that disappointing moment in high school, I attended a class reunion. One of the most meaningful events of my life happened that evening when one of my old classmates approached me and told me, “I just want you to know how much I appreciate the stand you took on the Bible in our high school classes. I remember it well. And I’m happy to tell you that I have given my life to Christ since that time, and your Christian example had something to do with it.”

As I’ve stated before, this series is about effective, deliberate parenting. God has invested us, as parents, with the responsibility to take care that our children are trained, protected, and ready to serve Him in powerful ways. Guarding their lives from worldly influence will make them stronger. Yes, much good has been done by people who were rescued from evil lives – those who repented, and then chose to serve God in mighty ways (the apostle Paul was a good example). But many more people throughout history were not able to climb out of the pit of sin that entrapped them once they fell in. I encourage Christian parents everywhere to purposefully choose the best and most God-honoring path for their children. That path is not the same for every child – God’s plan is far more textured and complex than a simple list of rights and wrongs. I pledge to be diligent in prayer for God to reveal His plan to our families, and for our light to shine, ultimately, in the most powerful way for Him.

The “Salt and Light” Argument (Part 2 – When To Let Your Kids Go)

For some reason, this subject has been heavy on my heart lately. I have prayed daily for wisdom about whether or not to write about it – and for God to reveal His truth to me on the topic. I have many dear friends who may simply disagree with the amount of protection that I give to my own children. The answer to the question “When should I let my kids go out into the world?” is not the same for every child or family. There is no easy formula. But for those who have children and who want to see them glorify God in their lives when they leave the nest, let me just say this – this is one thing that you don’t want to get wrong.

I plan to cover this topic in three segments:

1) The Big Test
2) The “Salt and Light” Argument
3) The Danger of Not Letting Them Go

Whether you agree or not – I encourage comments. I especially encourage other viewpoints when they are accompanied by scripture. Believe me when I say that this was written under prayerful circumstances, and with no accusing finger pointed at anyone. Really.
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When I consider whether or not to let my children participate in an event or situation (one where they have interaction with something other than pure Christian influences), the number-one viewpoint I get from others is that God calls us to be “salt and light”. Excerpts from Matthew 5:13-16 tell us:

“You are the salt of the earth…You are the light of the world…let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven.”

It is clear that God calls us to go into the world to season and shine. The danger of avoiding that altogether will be discussed in Part 3 of this series. I find no scriptures that say we should get all of the Christians together in one place and leave the world to its lost state – in fact, that would be unscriptural. We should not abandon the lost.

My point is that we need to be concerned about WHEN we send our children into the world on a regular basis.

Few would say their two-year-old is ready and equipped to be a light to a world dominated by Satan. Likewise, a thirty-five-year-old ought to have matured to fill that role. So, somewhere between two and thirty-five is the right time to release our children to be salt and light. Is that age six, twelve or twenty? The answer is not the same for every child or family. And please don’t misunderstand me – there are times when a six-year-old can have a profound influence through Christ on another individual. What I’m talking about is discerning the time to release our children to daily interaction and immersion in a corrupted culture. Should we free them to nearly any situation at a young age, no matter what, trusting that they will continue to shine, undamaged by the world? Is that what “salt and light” means?

The danger is revealed back in Matthew 5. In the latter part of verse 13, it says,

“But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.”

The warning from Jesus that I perceive in this verse is that it is possible for salt to “lose its saltiness”, that is, for a Christian to lose the spark and guidance that he or she obtained from God at one time. From Part 1 of this series – either our children will change the world, or the world will change them. Other verses bear this out:

“If they have escaped the corruption of the world by knowing our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and are again entangled in it and overcome, they are worse off at the end than they were at the beginning.” – 2 Peter 2:20

“Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold.” – Matthew 24:12

“Yet I hold this against you. You have forsaken your first love.” – Revelation 2:4

Again, it’s clear that there is a danger of slipping backward in the wrong circumstances. And what are those circumstances? The Thompson Chain Reference Bible lists seven different reasons that a person could “backslide”, to use an old-school word (Chain Index topic #994, for those who would like to do further study), and they are these:

· Absence of spiritual leaders
· Evil associations
· Worldly success
· Shallowness
· Emptiness of life
· Lack of spiritual insight
· Love of the world

These considerations need to be taken into account when we choose our own activities, and certainly when we make parenting decisions about our children. Wise parenting means we should think on these things whenever we “send our kids out” – whether it is to activities with large time commitments like school or camp, or even to smaller situations like a youth function or a sleepover at a friend’s house.

The answer is not black and white, and again, it’s not the same for every child. Jesus was found in the temple “listening and asking questions” of the religious leaders when he was twelve years old (Luke 2:46) – a great start. It was not until he was baptized, had been tempted directly by Satan, and had turned thirty that he began his ministry (wouldn’t you love to know for certain what he did with his time before this?). Luke 4:14 says that he returned from the temptation in the desert “in the power of the Spirit”. Could he have started his ministry earlier than age thirty? I wouldn’t limit Jesus’ ability in any way. But it seems important to me that God (and his father and mother) chose this path of learning and progressive exposure before he immersed himself in a depraved culture in order to save it. He had unwavering strength to complete the task by the time he was thirty-three.

Yes, we are called to be salt and light. And there are times when our children will be thrust into that role. But we must take care when and how they are placed into that position. Proverbs 22:6 tells us to “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” I focus on the words “train” and “old” in that passage. It is a parent’s direct responsibility to be sure that their child is trained and ready. And a parent should pray for wisdom to know WHEN that time should be. Satan is doing everything he can to dilute our precious “salt” and have it be “trampled by men”. With God’s grace, and with vigilant parents, we will together see him fail and our children become victorious.

One final thought, again from Matthew 5. What does it mean to be a “city on a hill”? Why did Jesus use that image? I need to think on that one.

Next: The Danger of Not Letting Them Go

The Big Test (Part 1 – When To Let Your Kids Go)

For some reason, this subject has been heavy on my heart lately. I have prayed daily for wisdom about whether or not to write about it – and for God to reveal His truth to me on the topic. I have many dear friends who may simply disagree with the amount of protection that I give to my own children. The answer to the question “When should I let my kids go out into the world?” is not the same for every child or family. There is no easy formula. But for those who have children and who want to see them glorify God in their lives when they leave the nest, let me just say this – this is one thing that you don’t want to get wrong.

I plan to cover this topic in three segments:

1) The Big Test
2) The “Salt and Light” Argument
3) The Danger of Not Letting Them Go

Whether you agree or not – I encourage comments. I especially encourage other viewpoints when they are accompanied by scripture. Believe me when I say that this was written under prayerful circumstances, and with no accusing finger pointed at anyone. Really.
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Imagine for a moment this scenario. Your child, along with every other child in your neighborhood, must prepare for, and one day take, a written test administered by the local school district. The ground rules are pretty simple. They go like this: 1) the questions are not a slam-dunk – they require real knowledge and preparation about a known topic, 2) your child may take the test any time between the ages of six and twenty-one, 3) they have only one opportunity to take the test – no re-tests are allowed, and 4) the test is truly “pass-fail” – that is, if they pass, your child will be allowed to live, and if they fail, the school district will execute your child.

How much preparation would you insist on before you let your child go take the test?

I’m sure that most parents would insist on their child’s attention to the subject matter, and would enforce a great deal of preparation time. I think most parents would worry enough about the consequences that they would establish a study routine that would guarantee success. Many parents would take over the training personally, just to leave no doubt that their child is ready for the Big Test. No one would simply look at the test casually, and send them off one day saying, “I think they’re probably ready.”

My analogy is not perfect, but I believe it is very much like the multiple decisions we must make as parents to give up precious hours and oversight of our children– to public school, sports, and even to church youth group. When they are not under the care and attention of me and my wife, bad things can happen. Minds can be changed. Respect and allegiance may shift. Our children may see things that they will not be able to get out of their minds – things that may never leave their thoughts, even into adulthood. Yes, some of these things can happen at home, too, but I firmly believe that my wife and I stand a better chance of providing the proper oversight to my own children than any other people on the planet.

Things are different today than they were for most of the last five thousand years. “Progress” which we now take for granted, like cars and buses and the ability to move about and gather into large groups many times a week have changed the face of the family – and I think eroded the importance of the parents in a child’s life. The practice of stratifying children into age groups at churches, through youth ministry, is fairly recent. Public schools in the United States have only been in existence for the last 150 years. Before this, families would learn together, often huddled around a Bible or a copy of Pilgrim’s Progress. There were no youth group activities or PTA meetings in Bible times.

Most of our friends are aware that we homeschool our children. We don’t do this to provide them with a superior education (though I think that is indeed a benefit). We do it for this reason: a study conducted by the National Home Education Research Institute and presented by Pastor Voddie Baucham shows that 70-88% of professing Christian teens fall away from their faith at the end of their freshman year in college. Yet, only 6% of homeschooled, professing Christian teens fall away in that time frame. Consider those statistics again…there is at least a seven out of ten chance that a publicly-schooled child will reject God after their first year of college. Less than one out of ten will do so if they are homeschooled.

This study may be tough for some to accept, especially when so few of us believe that such a result could possibly occur in our own family. And we should understand very clearly, the study does not explicitly prove that schooling is the only factor that determines a child’s grasp on God’s grace. It stands to reason that a homeschooled child will have more parental involvement in his or her life, and this is a big contributor to the Christian walk. I believe further study would conclude that public-schooled children who enjoy a devoted father and mother, and a family who prays and worships together regularly will improve on the 70-88% odds greatly. But once again, any study that concludes with such a diverse result – 70-88% versus 6% - is either flawed, or else it has uncovered a fundamental issue to be considered.

Either our children will change the world, or the world will change them. It’s a rare situation where two opposing views are thrown together for hours a day without at least one side’s viewpoint being changed. These are hard words to read. They were hard words to write. But in the end, isn’t the goal of every Christian parent to ready their children…for the Big Test?

Next: The "Salt and Light" Argument

Taking Back The Culture – Part 2

My kids were playing with some other children the other day, when in the midst of playing a game, one of the other kids let out a bad word. The child’s sister looked over at him and said, “Hey, don’t you remember? Mom told us not to talk that way around the Metzger kids!” Before any of you wonder if it was your kids – please believe me, it wasn’t. I’m pretty certain that this family doesn’t read my blog.

I’ll admit that it makes me happy that our kids have this reputation with others. Without making it a source of pride, I feel gratified that my own children get that level of respect.

Bad language among children is nothing new. I have to admit that I participated in it when I was very young – my parents never knew (I think - right, Mom?). But other aspects of our culture have definitely changed since I was a kid. This erosion of the culture has been executed in steps, gradually overtaking the godly principles that used to be evident in families in this country. We now look back at television examples such as the Cleavers on Leave It To Beaver or the Bradys on The Brady Bunch with ridicule – as if no family could be so goody-goody and naïve. You know what? Our family is actually like that in many ways – and I love it.

There is constant pressure from all sides to “adjust” to the new culture – as if our society is constantly maturing and has become superior to anything that came before. Think on this - would the culture of today have been possible fifty years ago? Not a chance. For example, we now see some parents buying games for their children which reward players for killing innocent bystanders, police, and prostitutes, while using a wide range of weapons, including baseball bats. Would that product have sold at the same time as when I Love Lucy was being aired on television? I simply can’t believe that there was a market for it back then. But there certainly is today. That is culture shift.

What’s the difference between 1959 and 2009? It’s not just technology or the availability of video gaming systems. I believe it is the parents. As I pointed out back in Part 1 of this series, many parents have suddenly accepted the belief that their children have the right to make their own decisions about nearly anything. I’ve had parents tell me, “I want my children to learn about life on their own. That’s how they will prepare for being independent.” I cannot subscribe to this philosophy. I firmly believe that my children must be led and directed by godly principles – which come from God and the family, not from the culture.

This may offend some people. No one wants to be told that their parenting technique is not the best one. But consider this – there is no parent-designed technique that is right or perfect, because there is a bigger concept in play here. And it gets back, once again, to the culture.

No matter how hard we try, we cannot create a proper man-made culture. Though our society tries over and over to remake our way of life, we must realize this – our culture will always be broken if we have a hand in it. The only culture that survives is a God-made culture. Thankfully, that is exactly what we are awaiting – a day when all things will be made new.

Taking Back The Culture – Part 1

I took my oldest daughter across town to buy a used iPod yesterday. The iPod had belonged to a 13-year-old girl, who had thought she lost it, bought another, and then found the original one. As we discussed the sale with the girl and her mother, the mother leaned over to us and said, “You’ll probably want to wipe the songs off of that before you use it, as I’m sure there is a lot of inappropriate music loaded onto it.” I started to smile, but then thought better of it.

What struck me about her statement is not so much that the mother did not have control over her daughter, but more importantly, she didn’t seem to think she should exercise that control. It seemed strange to us, since her daughter was right there listening to the conversation, that she could tell us that the inappropriate content should be erased, but she couldn’t turn and tell her own daughter that same thing.

That seems wrong to me. I was raised in such a way that I did not have free reign over what I did, what I viewed, or how I behaved. Similarly, I control what my own children are exposed to – movies, music, television shows (what little we watch), and books. My kids know, without having to wonder, that everything they do is subject to the approval of me and my wife. Curiously, it has rarely caused any arguments in our family. In many areas, my kids are even more conservative that I am (see “We Moo At Bad Words” for a funny application that our family shares). They have even been known to politely refuse to watch an inappropriate movie at a friend’s sleepover – based on principle, not because they fear that they will get into trouble.

Our family was privileged to attend two different high school graduations this past weekend. My wife and son traveled to Indianapolis for the homeschool graduation of our lovely niece, Abby Richardson. And the rest of us were here in Fort Collins attending the homeschool graduation of our friend, Ally Chase. Both of these girls are beautiful examples of godly teenagers and they have a bright future. And what they both have in common is that their parents taught them well – by first teaching them to love the Lord. This love is evident in their lives to everyone who knows them. Their parents were not afraid to pass on this devotion, and they are being rewarded for it. Both of these girls have the desire to change the world for Christ.

Here are some truths I’m learning as I watch the world around me, and work to raise my own children in the same way as the Richardsons and Chases:

1) Children do not have the right to listen to or watch whatever they want,

2) Our culture is constantly moving farther from God’s principles,

3) Parents are the ones who should direct their children’s cultural involvement until such an age where the child can make good decisions – left to their own judgment at too early an age, the impression of the world’s culture may leave a permanent mark.

This has truly shaped up to be a spiritual battle – for the very souls of our children. We should never forget that Satan is using the constantly-shifting culture to facilitate an increasing departure from God. As the culture erodes, we are tempted to erode with it. If we erode God’s principles, even at a slower pace than the culture, we are still moving away from God. He does not change (Hebrews 6:17), even though the world around us does. We have to pick a path – the unchanging one of God, or the ever-changing one of the world - down which to steer our children.

And that requires parents to stay anchored to the unchanging principles of God.

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Jump to Part 2.