"Twilight" and The Apple

One of the most popular teen (and older-than-teen) book series out today is Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight. There is much that can be said about this series (none of it is good, in my opinion). I have not read the books themselves, but have researched and read synopses in order to be informed of the plot, and of the writer’s purpose. I encourage others to not read the series, but to learn and teach of the dangers within and to keep it away from our children – you can start by taking a few minutes to read this excellent Christian perspective, or my daughter’s recent blog on the subject.

I simply want to comment on the cover of the first book – and what it implies about where our culture is today. The picture that appears on the cover is shown above.

You see, a long time ago, at the very beginning of human history, God created a perfect world in which to live. There was no death, no ruin, no decay…and no sin. God created things to work perfectly and without breakage. Most importantly, this system honored God and revealed His ability to create perfection. He created Adam and Eve and placed them in a Garden to enjoy His creation and live for His glory. Only one rule was set down – do not eat of the fruit of the tree in the middle of the Garden. And as we all know, after a while that rule was broken, and sin entered the world for the very first time…with the result that mankind fell away from the perfect relationship that he had enjoyed with God.

The fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil is often referred to as an apple. And that apple represents the temptation that brought mankind to be separated from God, and brought death back into the world. From Genesis 3:17-19:

‘To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat of it,’ Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.”’

Nothing worse has ever happened to mankind than this separation. Because of that event, God had to send his Son several thousand years later to die and save mankind from making this separation permanent. The fall of Adam was the darkest moment in human history.

Yet, I fear that the weight of this event has been lost by a modern generation. Witness the very words that Stephenie Meyer uses to describe the photo on the cover of her book:

“The apple on the cover of Twilight represents “forbidden fruit.” I used the scripture from Genesis (located just after the table of contents) because I loved the phrase “the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil.” Isn't this exactly what Bella ends up with? A working knowledge of what good is, and what evil is. . . . In the end, I love the beautiful simplicity of the picture. To me it says: choice.”

So, the choice between good and evil is a good thing? To Meyer, the moment of the apple and the resultant fall of man is “beautiful”. She has forgotten God’s original purpose – that God wants a perfect relationship with us – and yet hundreds of thousands of teens fail to question the premise and position of her book. They think they are reading a “love story”. Yet, it was God’s intent that we never have to experience the ravages of evil and disease and death. This is the original love story! I would love to live in a place where I did not have this “choice”, but where God’s goodness was the only option available. Someday, we will know this existence again!

I appeal to our generation – train your children to understand the importance of that moment when we were separated from God. Help them to know that “choice” is not always a good thing. And help them to understand that our culture desperately needs to be restored to God again, back to the perfect design He had in the beginning. Mankind is not “evolving” by being granted more choices – instead, it is the very existence of our choice between good and evil that points to a brokenness. God has the cure. If you are reading this and want to know more, please write me.

Notes: The Christian Family Conference 2010 (Part 9)

My wife, oldest daughter and I attended the Christian Family Conference in Denver this past week. It was an amazing time of encouragement with other Christian parents – most of whom are devoted to homeschooling and home-training their children to be godly men and women, prepared to take on the world with a multi-generational vision. I’m posting some of the notes I took from the conference sessions. Some are sure to fly in the face of the traditions and cultures which most people would consider normal in today’s culture. But these men who spoke to us used the Scriptures, and their lives and the lives of their children are a testament to their integrity and boldness on these topics. Their words motivate me to continue to raise my children in a radical, counter-culture, God-fearing way.

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Chuck Black is an ex-test pilot turned homeschooling father. Really. He gave a lot of very practical lessons about raising our children in today’s world. One look at his family will demonstrate his success in the area of parenting – if you stop by his booth, his children are there running the show – they are polite, well-spoken, talented , and well on their way to becoming lights for God in a dark world.

Chuck did an excellent job of reinforcing my belief that it is the family, not church youth groups, that is responsible for developing maturity in our children. “Youth group” is a relatively modern creation. Our family often must choose between youth group activities…and being together as a family. We almost always choose the latter, and I believe that this is the biblical model. Please don’t get this wrong – I’m not saying that youth groups are inherently bad or evil – the point is that parental involvement should be the primary driver of spiritual and emotional maturity. Without it, youth group gatherings can be simply a pooling of immaturity with no real lasting value. When the parents abdicate the role of being the main spiritual mentors and enforcers in the family, the children are operating at a severe disadvantage.

“Equipping Your Children to Overcome the Cultural Pressures of Today” by Chuck Black

· One-hundred years ago, children transitioned to adulthood in a very short time, and at a young age. Today, we allow them seven to eight years of “teenage time”. This is a new invention – it didn’t used to be this way.

· Part of the reason is that there is a lot more time, money, and available entertainment in today’s society

· Children are maturing physically at an earlier age, but their spiritual and emotional maturity is coming later – this creates a maturity gap that is often filled with entertainment – and Satan is targeting this gap, instead of allowing the family to fill it

· Negative peer pressure and broken relationships exacerbate the maturity problem

· Problems in today’s society that need strong parenting in order to avoid them:

· 1) Large amounts of time are spent with immature youth – limit it, monitor it, or stop it!

· 2) Our children are culturally encouraged to spend time with, or have physical relationships with the opposite sex, without commitment – don’t allow it!

· 3) Young people are culturally discouraged to marry at an early age – this creates physical pressures and may increase the length of the maturity gap

· 4) Our children live in an entertainment-oriented world – one way we can push back against this is to help our children discover the joy and accomplishment in labor

· 5) We have culturally established academic education to take place outside of the home – parents are rarely seen as teachers anymore, and this is a fairly recent change in our society (over the last 150 years). Homeschooling restores this area to its proper place.

· 6) We have culturally established spiritual education to take place outside of the home – many parents see Sunday school or youth group as being the prime places where their children will learn about God, and so have abdicated the role of being the spiritual leaders of their family, in favor of a youth minister or another parent.

· When you see a young man or woman who is especially mature for their age, ask yourself – did they get that way because of what happened to them at school, at church…or at home?

· Chuck Black’s wife calculates that homeschooling allows her to spend 15,680 more hours with each of her children than if she had sent them to public school. There is a lot of mentoring and heartfelt communication that can take place during those hours.

· The responsibilities of parents toward their children: 1) Lead your children to the Lord, 2) Train your children, 3) Discipline your child, 4) Equip your child, 5) Protect your children from physical, emotional, and spiritual harm, 6) Carefully expose your children to important things – keep them innocent, but not ignorant, 7) Disciple your children in the Lord – and be purposeful about this, 8) Launch your children toward a target

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Notes: The Christian Family Conference 2010 (Part 8)

My wife, oldest daughter and I attended the Christian Family Conference in Denver this past week. It was an amazing time of encouragement with other Christian parents – most of whom are devoted to homeschooling and home-training their children to be godly men and women, prepared to take on the world with a multi-generational vision. I’m posting some of the notes I took from the conference sessions. Some are sure to fly in the face of the traditions and cultures which most people would consider normal in today’s culture. But these men who spoke to us used the Scriptures, and their lives and the lives of their children are a testament to their integrity and boldness on these topics. Their words motivate me to continue to raise my children in a radical, counter-culture, God-fearing way.

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Another one from Voddie Baucham’s book, What He Must Be…If He Wants To Marry My Daughter. I have to say, most people in our society will view Voddie’s points as “old-fashioned” or behind the times. But if these principles are truly laid out by God – who never changes (1 Samuel 15:29, Malachi 3:6) – then they are as timeless as He is. So why are we often led to believe that the principles of dating, discipleship, fatherhood, and character must change as our society does?

“The Four P’s” by Voddie Baucham

Any boy who approaches me with the idea of marrying my daughter must understand these four principles of husbandhood, fatherhood, and leader:

· Priest – represents his people before God – 1 Peter 3:7 – the father or young man needs to walk with God and be on his knees in prayer on his family’s behalf

· Prophet – represents God before his people – Ephesians 5:25-27, 6:1-4 – handle the Word accurately – does the young man know how to view the Word and use it? (Note – this question is not, “Does he agree with me on every single Biblical topic?” Some things may come with time, while some are mandatory up-front)

· Provider – makes sure his people have what they need – 1 Timothy 5:8, 11-14, 2 Thessalonians 3:6-12, Colossians 3:22, Proverbs 6:5-11, 1Thessalonians 4:10-12 – the suitor needs to have a job, a work ethic, and needs to know how to handle money – just remember, he probably won’t look like upper-middle class at age 20, and that’s okay – place expectations of sense and ethics on the boy, not acquired wealth by age 20

· Protector – puts himself between his people and those that would harm them – Nehemiah 4:14 – notice that “husbands” are left out of this list in the verse, because they are the ones doing the protecting

· The man who is a protector needs to be three things – 1) a man of personal strength, 2) a man of wisdom, and not a fool, 3) a man of courage, and not a coward

· The difference between a protector and a poacher? Consider the young man who wants to express an interest in your daughter. The one who secretly dates your daughter for two years and then approaches you asking for her hand is like a hunter who drags an elk out of the woods and goes in search of the game warden to request a hunting tag after the kill. But a young man who is truly concerned with your daughter’s heart will approach you, the father, before even letting the girl know that he has an interest (after observing her from afar) – because he is looking after her heart and her long-term best interest. A boy who does that is a true protector. (I have to say, the first time I heard Voddie say this, I thought it was a bit idealistic. But after thinking on it, I realize that a young man like that is exactly what I would want for my daughters – it is not too lofty a goal. This goes along with the post on dating I’ll be publishing shortly.)

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Notes: The Christian Family Conference 2010 (Part 7)

My wife, oldest daughter and I attended the Christian Family Conference in Denver this past week. It was an amazing time of encouragement with other Christian parents – most of whom are devoted to homeschooling and home-training their children to be godly men and women, prepared to take on the world with a multi-generational vision. I’m posting some of the notes I took from the conference sessions. Some are sure to fly in the face of the traditions and cultures which most people would consider normal in today’s culture. But these men who spoke to us used the Scriptures, and their lives and the lives of their children are a testament to their integrity and boldness on these topics. Their words motivate me to continue to raise my children in a radical, counter-culture, God-fearing way.

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This talk was lifted from Voddie Baucham’s book, What He Must Be…If He Wants To Marry My Daughter. In it, he presents the high expectations that Christian fathers should have for their wife’s spouse. Society today would think these to be radical and even controlling. But, like Voddie, I am not willing to compromise on this point.

“A Father’s Role” by Voddie Baucham

· The crisis today has been caused by the fact that most of our parents didn’t do marriage well, didn’t teach us to do it well, and so we aren’t doing it well, nor are we teaching our children. Like most parents today, we are just praying and hoping that our children “find a good one”. But there is a more active role that can be played.

· “Practice doesn’t make perfect, practice makes permanent”

· The Bible is not silent on the issue of a father’s responsibility – to his family, and specifically to his daughters and sons.

· A Father’s Responsibility to His Family:

· The Old Testament is full of fatherly responsibilities – food, shelter, clothing, rest (the fourth commandment), defending the household, remembering Israel’s history, etc.

· And in the New Testament – model a personal commitment to Christ, provide for the family (1 Timothy 5:8), lead and disciple his wife (Ephesians 6:26), his children (Ephesians 6:1-4), and to lead the family in prayer (1 Peter 3:7)

· A Father’s Responsibility to His Daughter:

· Protect his daughter from male predators and bringing her to her husband as a virgin (Exodus 22:16-17, Deuteronomy 22:20-21)

· Provide a dowry (Genesis 29:24, 29)

· Provide for her by finding a suitable husband and making proper arrangements (Genesis 29:15-20)

· Consider this – in modern weddings, when the minister asks who gives the bride in marriage, it is most often heard “Her mother and I do” from the father. But this practice only came into popularity at the wedding of President Lyndon Johnson’s daughter at the White House in 1960, when LBJ was counseled to say it in order to keep the feminist vote on his side. Before 1960, that standard practice was for the father to respond to the question with, “I do”. Has our society watered down the Biblical, prominent role of the father in the raising of his daughters? Unfortunately, yes.

· Protect our daughters from rash vows (Numbers 30:3-5) – in this verse, the father’s decision can override a daughter’s vow – we don’t just say, “Oh well, it’s her life” – consider this when asked to attend the wedding if you disapprove of the person your child has chosen to marry – that’s a tough, tough lesson to learn – the best thing is to train and monitor what happens before this happens in order to avoid the situation altogether

· Some things that make us miss the pious life – we are 1) ignorant, 2) indifferent, 3) idolatrous, and 4) independent – instead of being pious and living for God, we live for ourselves

· We can only overcome the “four I’s” above with God’s help, if we go back to God’s Word, and if we obey what he says

· “Dating” recommendations – our daughters shouldn’t be dating in the sense that our society approves today – the current dating model is unbiblical and takes the place of the role of the father-daughter relationship. What is the Biblical model? 1) Model a life for your daughter to imitate, 2) teach your daughter God’s principles, 3) protect your daughter from harm, 4) get your daughter in the proximity of the right young men (and out of the company of the wrong ones)

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(I have already written a future post about the “dating” rules in our household – they are far more conservative than our society dictates, but I believe they are scriptural – coming soon - Alan)

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